I have a friend who was recently promoted to a leadership position. He is now leading the same group where he was previously one of the team members; now he is the leader of the team.
The transition is a bit tricky - because through the course of time prior to his new appointment, he had become good friends with those he now leads. Whereas once he was part of the gang; now he is leader of the pack.
And so now it is up to him to lead - he has become the new leader and they must now follow. He cannot simply remain "buddy-buddy" with the team.. Like it or not, there has been a shift in authority - now he is not merely a player on the team, he is in charge.
He asked what I thought he should do. I told him that most of what happens going forward is in his own hands (after all, he is the leader).
Yet, only because he had asked, I then offered the following thoughts for his consideration:
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Face it. Admit to himself that the relationship between himself and his team has changed – he needs to face the reality of his new role.
- Set Apart. He must recognize and accept that he may feel set apart and alone at times, because he has been, and in many ways now is alone in the responsibility entrusted to him.
- Communicate. Meet with the team and communicate that he realizes there has been a change – acknowledge it in words and articulate that things will be different in their relationships going forward.
- Change. Recognize, and as needed express to the team, that he will no longer be able to participate in some of the discussions that may have occurred before the change to his new role,
- Respect. Seek to move from a position of friendship to a position of mutual respect.
- Authority. Recognize that he may be tested by the team he leads and that even though he has been appointed to leadership, his new position will nevertheless need to be earned - by his actions - he will need to “prove” that he can lead.
- Humility. Remain humble and teachable…realize that the greater the responsibility, the greater the need for humility.
There will be other things that my friend will encounter - and much that he will learn in his new position. The main point is that he must realize that his new role will create a new relationship…even with his old friends. By facing that reality up front, it may be easier for him to transition into his new role with his old friends.